Little Confidence Builders

I think we all need these in life sometimes. I know that school really knocked me down in a lot of ways, but built me up in others. For instance, classes. Man, those classes. Some days I would come home and just feel so demoralized, like there was no way that I could learn this stuff and that my brain was filled with cotton balls rather than grey matter. School has really made me appreciate the little moments in life that are positive and give little boosts of confidence, no matter how small.

For instance, rotations are usually great sources of confidence boosts. I was talking with one of my school friends last night who is going through a really great rotation. Her preceptor makes her come up with differential diagnoses, get the history, do the physical exams, and write the notes afterwards while teaching her all along the way. She said that she feels like she will be able to do this one day. That's what rotations really do, allow us to see that we will indeed be able to do this one day, that we are capable of it. I know for me, hands-on learning is my number one best learning style and that's why rotations are so incredibly valuable to me. School is great for the background knowledge, but it's only when I get out and do it that I really start putting it all together.

Another little great confidence boost is doing something that I can see tangible progress in. Steve and I recently started rock climbing (inside at a gym; we hope to move outside soon!) and it really gives me a boost to climb a route that I'd previously not been able to do. It also helps me melt away some of the mental funk I walk into the gym with (of course, I walk out with a different kind of funk...I definitely get sweaty!), which is beyond valuable.

One more confidence boost is finally getting the hang of something. I don't know why, but it takes me longer to catch onto things than other people. I really have to do something multiple multiple times before it sticks; but when it sticks, I feel great! Things suddenly become clear and I feel like I can do this.

Confidence boosts are necessary in everybody's life, not just a students. What gets your confidence up?

So here it is, almost time for school to start again and I haven't updated this blog in forever! So much for using the copious amounts of free time i have to reflect and learn from the past year...nah, I did that. I just didn't blog about it! This summer has gone by so quickly, but so slowly as well. I've traveled a lot (Atlanta, North Carolina, Oklahoma), spent time with loved ones, camped a little, moved across the city, packed and unpacked (almost done!) an apartment, brushed up on a little school material, completed one rotation, and took up a new hobby. Now I have 1.5 weeks remaining of true break and then 2 weeks of a rotation that will take me down to Alamosa. Then school will start and all the leisure that I have in my life will disappear extremely rapidly. These are the things that I've learned from this summer that's almost over:

-Family is one of the biggest blessings in my life. I remember Mom always telling me that friends come and go, but family is always there. I'm so happy to find that is true and that my family is also my friend(s) (horribly awkward sentence, oh well.) This summer I felt so blessed to spend time with those I love, but now I'm feeling withdrawal. I find myself getting jealous (something I really try to avoid; it's not healthy and it's not appreciating where God has me) of those that I know who live in the same city as their family. One day, maybe this will happen, but until then, I'll work on being content with good, soul-quenching visits.

-I can't stay at home. I'm not sure why, but part of my personality means that I have to have a schedule that forces me to get out of the apartment and interact with others.

-A clean apartment=tidy mind. Which is very weird for me.

-I enjoy getting up in the mornings! Even MORE weird for me. I'm on break and I'm getting up at 6:30...WILLINGLY. Soooo bizarre. I just enjoy going for a run, then having a cup of coffee and eating breakfast on the patio and still having the whole day to do what I want.

-I can do something demeaning/be talked down to with a smile on my face and not a begrudging spirit. (However, this is still a work in progress)

-Finding something that I enjoy that is exercise, but I forget that it is is possible! I've always enjoyed running (after I get in shape), but have always still had to force myself to do it. I found something that I don't have to force myself to do and it's a great self-esteem boost.

Well, it's time to wrap this up. Steve and I are going to meet one of his work friends. I promise to post more again!

Summertime Is So Fine!

The semester is finally over and, more importantly, I survived! Finals week was as to be expected - horrible! Luckily, finals "week" was only 2 days long, with only my two time-consuming classes giving finals. Sadly, both professors took it upon themselves to try to outdo each other in roughness of the quality of the tests. Happily, I'm done with both of the classes AND the professors and won't have to retake anything. Here's what I've done on my summer break so far:

-End of the semester breakfast/book club meeting with PA gal pals. We started a book club this semester and actually kept it up throughout the craziness. We've read a variety of different books and had a great time discussing them. For the end of the semester, we ate at Snooze, a local Denver breakfast eatery renowned for their pancakes and all around breakfast yumminess.

-Had a wonderful visit from Dave and Ann for Steve's graduation ceremony. We did so much! We ate at Snooze, went to the Denver Botanic Gardens, rode the Georgetown Loop railroad (where we did a mine tour-so neat!), walked along Pearl Street Mall in Boulder, visited the Celestial Seasonings gift shop in Boulder (we tried to do a tour, but we were too late!), visited the Dushanbe Tea House, had a picnic by a mountain lake, and ate at the Buckhorn Exchange (as seen on Man vs Food; it has a RIDICULOUS amount of stuffed animals). Keep in mind, we were trying to keep the activity "light"....Dave and Ann were great sports!

-Watched Steve walk in his graduation ceremony and get an award for being the outstanding Philosophy of Religion student at Denver Seminary. It was the first time the award had ever been given!

-Got a manicure/pedicure with a Groupon at The Denver Nail Lounge, this incredibly cute little nail boutique on 16th Street Mall in downtown Denver. I'll be going back...but only because my groupon was 2-for-1. This place is booked for months!

-Got my hair cut, but nothing special. I've had some pretty bad cuts recently and just want it to be a basic haircut. As long as I can pull it back, I'm good. I got so spoiled in Stillwater!

-Celebrated our 5 year anniversary with Steve in Crested Butte. This was also a joint Steve Got A Job! Celebration

-Steve got a job! He's working in Broomfield, Co at a place that deals with mortgages...we're so happy! This leads to the next point...

-We found a condo to move to in Louisville, Co! My tutor for ISBM (one of my difficult classes) lives in Louisville and I used to drive up to meet her for tutoring sessions; I absolutely fell in love with it! We were very very lucky to find the place that we did; our landlords seem great so far. Steve will be able to bike commute to his job and I will be able to ride the express bus to campus. We will be 5 minutes driving time from our favorite grocery store and warehouse shopping AND 5 minutes walking time from this absolutely amazing biking/running path. Did I mention that Louisville is about 10 minutes away from Boulder, so we are super close to the foothills/mountains? This means that we have incredible scenery almost anywhere you look! (Until you look east towards Denver and see all the smog...yuck!)

-I have taken up exercising again-whew! Yesterday Stout and I went hiking up Mount Sanitas in Boulder. It's known as a "thigh-burner" but all those Boulderites jog up. I'm not even kidding. Since I'm so out of shape and Stout has so much fur (he's not out of shape anymore! Our overweight behemoth of a dog that we adopted at 110 lbs has transformed into a svelte muscular little puppy at 72 lbs!), we absolutely struggled up and didn't even finish. I have no idea how close we were, but Stout kept trying to lead me off the path, where it looked easier. Normally when we go hiking, Stout absolutely loves to run on the path. He'll get off and do some exploring, but when we call for him, he runs top speed to us...on the path. Even when it's a switchback and he could run straight towards us. So needless to say, we were both tired yesterday. :) I look forward to getting into shape. I want to be healthy and a good example for patients when I am a practicing PA...lifestyle changes are difficult, so I'm trying to do it at a time when there isn't too much stress around.

-Relaxed! One thing I never anticipated when I was done with school was feeling guilty when I want to sleep in and then lay around for a couple hours. I want to be able to enjoy life and for me, I need to be able to slow down to enjoy certain things. I'm working on relaxing, which seems so counter-intuitive. It's a process.

-I'm going to Atlanta this weekend for the national AAPA (American Academy of Physician Assistants) conference. I'll be going with some of my classmates to take in some lectures, etc. I'm really excited!

So far my summer has been a little busy. It will continue to be so, but I'm trying to enjoy it as well. I have plans to go to New Bern and Oklahoma and am really looking forward to seeing family!

Dreaming of Summer time...

This past week, Summertime Fever hit me. Hit me HARD. This past week we got our assignments for our 1st year buddy, signifying our impending movement into the status of a 2nd year. This is literally crazy to me. I can't believe that as of May 12th, 33.3% of my PA school career will be over. Hallelujah! I started thinking back over the past year when I was thinking about what to tell my buddy to expect for the summertime and I realized how incredibly tough this past year has been. I started thinking about what I'd like to accomplish this summer. Other than 2 rotations (1 surgery rotation in Orthopedics and 1 family medicine clinic rotation in Alamosa, CO), I have the entire summer free. So here's a top 10 list of things I'd like to accomplish this summer:

1. DE-STRESS. I'm serious here. I'm going to do a lot of prayer meditation, a lot of figuring out how to unwind. I know I'm not the most laid back person normally, but it has gotten BAD over the past year. I have a constant level of stress that is just not healthy. I've got to figure out some sort of regimen for this.

2. Exercise. I'd like to climb Pikes Peak this summer; definitely not in shape for that! I guess this will also be part of my de-stress regimen.

3. Read lots of books.

4. Hike. A LOT.

5. Camp

6. Bike. Learn how to mountain bike without fear. Well, maybe mountain bike with respect.

7. Go home for a visit

8. Swim and get a tan. In as healthy way as possible-I don't want skin cancer, thank you very much. Maybe put lots of spf 70 on or something. This is TBD.

9. Review some school subjects that I didn't get as well as I'd like to the first time around.

10. Clean the house and organize. Top to bottom. I love to organize and I just can't find anything around here. Unfortunately after I do this, Steve won't be able to find anything. It's a sad trade-off. :)

From Large and (Sometimes) In Charge Patients to Itty Bitty Patients

School is still just as crazy (and just got WAY crazier in an unforeseen tragedy), but the past month has been a breath of fresh air as far as my rotations go. This semester, our program has us in what they call the Lifespan Rotation. We literally see patients from birth to death. One month is spent doing volunteer work since they like to emphasize that PAs are supposed to be involved in service in their community. One month is spent in a short Parenting class so we can learn how to give advice on the common issues of having a child (sleeping, tantrums, potty training, etc). Two weeks is spent in a Long Term Care setting. Two weeks is spent in the Newborn Nursery. One month is spent visiting patients in hospice. All in all, a lot of stuff.

This past month was the month I spent in the Long Term Care and the Newborn Nursery. Surprisingly to me, I absolutely loved the Long Term Care setting. This patient population is absolutely not my cup of tea, but my preceptor really taught me a lot as far as what it's really like to be a PA. It's really easy to lose focus on the end goal when you're stuck in the mire of rude professors and seemingly silly projects. This preceptor allowed us to view charts and then examine the patient all on our own. It was a great learning opportunity with no stress; I could examine a patient, practicing my exam skills and then practice my charting skills. I was able to build confidence and to critique myself, thinking about what I could do different next time. It was like really being a PA (he rechecked the patient after us, just so you know we're not on the loose!). He didn't treat us like students, he treated us like colleagues. He's a pretty impressive PA himself; he owns his own business and actually employs his supervising physician. I thought that something like that wasn't ok in CO, but apparently it is!
After Long Term Care was the rotation I was looking forward to the most. I was SO excited! Finally, the Newborn Nursery. But our preceptor was sick the entire first week, so it ended up being a very different experience than the rest of my classmates got. However, I will most definitely try to get a rotation there my 3rd year. It was really nice to feel the confidence again at examining this baby without feeling overwhelmed or lost. Babies are one of my favorite things in life and it's nice to be able to calm an upset newborn down so that I can listen to their heart or lungs. It's nice to know what I'm doing and to feel comfortable examining this incredibly tiny person. And as much as I'm trying to not seek the praise of my preceptors (it's just not healthy for me), it's nice to have a preceptor tell me that I have "the touch for pediatrics". It's just nice.
So far this semester, these rotations have picked me up from getting bad exam scores and helped me to see that I just might be a good PA one day; and I know more than I think I do! I certainly know more than those test scores show. Heavens, they're not great! I'm learning to accept the fact that I know the material, even if a number on a piece of paper doesn't reflect that. It's hard, but hopefully I will get there.

And So It Begins...Again

Even though school started 2 weeks ago, I've still felt like I've been on vacation. A much needed vacation. Last week, I had class on Monday and Friday. And that was it! It was faaaabulous. It made me wonder what life could be like with only 1 class...and then I remembered it would be boring and the only reason I was treasuring it so was because I knew that in a few days it would all cut loose. It cuts loose tomorrow actually, with my day starting at 8:30 am and ending after 9pm, but the past few days have been so tremendously relaxing that I'm ok with a busy week.

Saturday, Steve and I went for a hike in Denver since the weather was cooperating so nicely. We had a nasty cold snap from what feels like October to January (but was really more like December to January 5; my memory is little on the melodramatic side), but the past few days have felt like spring, with sunny skies and temps in the upper 50s. We decided that we would just go somewhere near the city, since we slept in really late (criminally late; I thought that once I became an adult, I wouldn't be able to sleep past 10:30 anymore. Wrong!). Now keep in mind that we've had snow on the ground for over a month, which had just started to melt. Welp, it was muddy. Not too terribly bad, but bad enough that Stout's belly and all 4 paws looked like he'd been dipped carefully in chocolate. It was worth it! When I'm stressed to the max, I close my eyes and think of my favorite memories of being outside to calm me down. I always feel God's presence when I'm outside, just that warm calming peace that makes the whole experience sweeter. Saturday was definitely one of those days I'll pull back from my memory. Gorgeous!

We were able to go on another hike Sunday. It was cloudy and we were at a slightly higher elevation, so it was a little chilly and there was still quite a bit of snow that we hiked on, but still just glorious. Doing things outside always makes me feel like I've taken advantage of my time and used it well; even when our house is a wreck and a million other things need to be done, being outside is the one thing that for some reason makes me feel accomplished. On the flipside of that, Steve and I spent all day inside today, cooking and watching movies. THAT was a blast! It was nice to just relax and get ready for the semester to come. It was also nice to be able to avoid the parking lot that I-70 becomes when people are trying to return from the mountains.

Who Knew PA School Involved Pinky and The Brain?

I intend to start blogging again slightly more regularly than the rate I was achieving at the end of the last semester. That means with this one post, I have accomplished my goal! Anyway, this is a great way for me to remember the trials I have gone thru in school and also keep family updated with what's going on. So I hope to do a little better.

Last semester ended much better than I hoped for. During undergrad, finals week was always stressful due to the sheer amount of tests involved. However, in PA school, we had a week in October (which means it was midterms) that involved 7 or 8 tests plus class plus rotations plus a paper. In contrast, finals week was a beautiful summer day (despite the fact that the last day of class, when the temp outside was less than 10 degrees, we had to take a final in an unheated room. They are energy conscious here!) (not really, we have a classroom that we are the only program that uses it, so they never turn the heat on unless they remember to).

This semester has started and we are almost done with 1 week already. They are easing us into it, however, and we only have 1 class that meets sporadically. We start rotations next week, but I am lucky to have a volunteer opportunity first, which means that I get to play card games with the developmentally disabled and elderly for 1 month. Pretty great, so far. While my classmates and I like to moan that we weren't ready to come back, the reality is that this easy start means that we can get some material out of the way without being stressed out immediately. I really appreciate that!

The course that we are taking right now is neuroscience and the lecturer today ended the class time with a clip from Pink and the Brain, which I really encourage all to partake in. :)

**EDIT** Whoops, I meant to post this link! Enjoy it, Lindy - Pinky and the Brain are the best!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=snO68aJTOpM